Atlanta what the F%@K!!!????

Well I'm writing to you from Hotlanta -- NOT -- It's freaking freezing here!! And foolish me only came with open-toed shoes! And I kid you not, 'round about five o'clock it started to hail....!

So this is the first leg of the FEVER tour and I've gotta tell u that it's starting off on a very interesting foot.

I came down from New York on Delta - First class dontchaknow! The man sitting next to me was traveling with his dog, who he kept checking on like a new mother with an infant -- now I like dogs - really I do -- but come on now -- you take away my right to cigarette and now I have to share first class with a canine???

Anyway, in between him checking on his "pooch" and reading his Balducci paperback - he kept scratching his balls! I swear on my mother -- I ain't telling no lie.

Chronic ball itching! For nearly two hours this man scratched and scratched and scratched -- he scratched so much I starting scratching. Is it catching? I mumbled...he of course was not amused.

So I get to my hotel, The Westin in Buckhead - and what a surprise to me -- the entire hotel is NON-SMOKING!

This is the south -- tobacco land and I can't light up in my hotel room??? You know I was fit to be tied. So I smiled sweetly at the front desk person-- well its not her fault - and I hope she takes the news calmly when she finds out she won't be getting her yearly increase because the hotel has lost thirty percent of their clientele -- meaning the heaving puffing Europeans and Asians....

Anyway, I mozied on over to the Lenox Sqaure Mall -- lawd, you Atlanta chicks ain't nothing to fool with, huh? You believe in your hair, nails and shoes.....the women here are slick! And there I was, in my flip-flops and capri's trying my damnedest to hold my gut in!

I passed this one young woman in a BeBe outfit -- which was basically - and I'm not speaking in hyperbole here -- a pair of bikini briefs and bra top -- red of course, with her ten inch heels -- mine you the child wasn't no bigger than a size two - but still............

I left there and went to this seafood restaurant - I figured I'd sit outside and have a glass of wine along with some fish and chips. Humph! The cod must have been a year old -- I've never had fish so tough in my life -- isn't cod flaky? This was like chewing on a rubber tire....

I'm ranting, I know....but I've got to flush somewhere...and this is MY blog.

So here I sit, waiting for my dinner -- seared tuna w/veggies -- my day starts early tomorrow so I'm going to hit the treadmill and sauna in the morning. I will blog when I get to Dallas tomorrow night and let you know how the Atlanta signing went.

Thanks for letting me bend your ear.

Nite - nite